“Remember you must die.”On the night of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary and the eve of the feast of San Rocco di Montpellier, yours truly had what is commonly called a “Widow Maker” heart attack. Apparently, the evening’s merriment (food, drink and rough-housing with my teenage nephews) was a little too much for my bum ticker.
Never losing consciousness throughout the entire episode, it’s strange where the mind goes when you are near death. Thoughts of old flames, family, friends and late loved ones seems normal, but worrying about my aunt liking the homemade Pesto alla Trapanese I gave her was a little puzzling.
Not to sound overly cavalier, but at no point did I fear death. Having just gone to Confession, I was prepared for the worst. This doesn’t mean I wanted to die, just that I resigned myself to my fate and whatever God has planned for me.
A man of faith, I did silently pray to Our Lady, San Rocco and others for a miracle, and I truly believe my prayers were answered. They will all receive ex voto and the other private vows I made for graces received.
The outpouring of love and support from family and friends was not unexpected but was surprisingly more consequential and invigorating than I anticipated. As independent and reclusive as I sometimes try to be, the visits, calls and messages were most helpful and greatly appreciated.
The team of doctors and crack hospital staff that took care of me (especially the pastorally attentive hospital chaplain who gave me Confession and Communion on the tongue) were all amazing. I could never thank them enough. They will forever be in my prayers.
Blessed with a second chance, I have unfinished business to attend to and I will do my best to make the most of this opportunity. Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on me.
~ Giovanni di Napoli, August 22nd, Feast of the Immaculate Heart of Mary
Prayer for a Happy Death
O my Creator and Father, I beg of you the most important of all your graces: that of final perseverance and a holy death. Despite the fact that I have greatly misused the life you have given me, grant me the grace to live it well from this moment on and to end it in your holy love.
Let me die as the holy patriarchs died, leaving this valley of tears without sadness, to go and enjoy eternal rest in my true homeland.
Let me die as did glorious St. Joseph, accompanied by Jesus and Mary, pronouncing those sweetest of names, which I hope to extol for all eternity.
Let me die as did the Immaculate Virgin, in the purest of love and with the desire of uniting myself to the only object of my love.
Let me die as did Jesus on the cross, fully identified with the will of the Father and made into a holocaust for the sake of love.
